Art, God, and Life

Hope [again]

abbyblabby — Thu, 28 May 2009 06:11:00 +0000

Oops!–Drama at the gym Part 3

abbyblabby — Tue, 19 May 2009 05:15:00 +0000

So I hit the gym a lot earlier tonight. Earlier than usual. I was in the pool by 7:30. Usually I get there anywhere between 8 – 9:30. But not tonight. I had only swam a few laps, when guess who walks in? My new buddy Q! Remember how I told you that we somehow always swim at the same time, no matter what time I get there? Well, sure enough, there he was. But before he jumped in the pool, he was headed over to the hotub. Since we bonded the other day over the kickboard fight and I told him I knew Korean and all, I shouted across the pool area to him, “ON-YAW!!” Which, in Korean, means “hello, how are you?” I don’t know how to spell it in Korean, but that is how you say it. Anyways, he looks at me kind of funny and laughs and says, “Oh, hello, how are you doing? You know Korean, do you?”

And I paused and looked at him funny because I was thinking, uh, didn’t we just have this conversation two days ago? But then I thought maybe he was joking with me, so I decided to humor him. “Yes, I do. But I only know a little. I had Korean roommates.”

And he looked surprised and said, “Oh, you did, did you? How long?” Now I also told him this two days ago and I thought there’s no way he’s forgotten already. But, again, I decided to play along. “Just 3 months.” And he said, “Oh, I see. Very good.”

And it was then that it dawned on me: that was not my friend Q at all. It was just another man who looked exactly like him.

I was kind of mortified.

And as I swam my laps back and forth it also dawned on me why I always thought I saw Q every time I went to go swimming. I have a new theory. This man takes the first shift, from 7:30 – 8:30, and then Q must take the second shift and come around 8:30 – 9:30. Next time I see Q, I’m going to ask him and we’ll see if I have the right theory. It would totally make sense. No wonder I always THOUGHT I saw him. It wasn’t him the whole time.

Then every time I passed him, I really had to try to hold in my laughter, but I was smiling and laughing in my head. How embarassing! I totally thought he was Q. You guys would too. They look EXACTLY alike.

Still can’t believe I yelled ON-YAW for everyone to hear when it really wasn’t my BFF named Q. It was totally someone else. I’m just glad I didn’t call him by name…and I’m also glad that he truly does speak Korean and it wasn’t like I yelled that to someone who spoke Japanese or Chinese who wouldn’t understand.

The situations I get myself into, LOL. Just call me trouble.

Kickboard fight – drama at the gym part 2

abbyblabby — Sun, 17 May 2009 06:19:00 +0000

I was swimming along my merry way, trying to go fast and finish up my laps before the pool area closed. Just found out that now they’re on summer hours, the gym closes at 8 on Saturday (boo!) and the pool closes at 7:30 (double boo!). I had my own lane, and the middle lane was open with a nice Korean man on the other side. For some reason, both of us are almost always swimming at the same time. He’s always very friendly and amicable towards me. Even if we have to do circle swim, he lets me in, or I let him in and vice versa. I had a few more laps to go and noticed when I got to one end, an old guy picked up some kickboards and water belts and moved them. I thought to myself, well that’s nice, he’s trying to keep the pool area clean. (It wasn’t my kickboard, so I didn’t care.)

I kept swimming and thought nothing of it. A few more laps later, this old guy and the nice Korean man were yelling at each other. I couldn’t really tell what was going on or what was being said and then the old guy walked off and did this little hokey pokey dance and was laughing. So I figured, oh okay, they were both joking with each other. But as the nice Korean man was swimming towards me, and I was headed the other direction, he didn’t look very happy. He wasn’t laughing. And I thought, that’s weird.

Both of us finished our laps at the same time and then we both headed into the sauna. “How was your workout?” he asked me. I said, “It was great, I didn’t know they closed at 8 on Saturdays now, and the pool area at 7:30 so I was trying to swim fast to get all my laps in.”

“Oh, I see. Very good.”

I didn’t say anything then, and a few seconds later he said, “You know, that man makes me so angry. He takes my kickboard while I’m using it. I went to grab it and it was gone. He always tells me that old people trip and fall over the kickboards lying around, but I find that hard to believe. I have never seen anyone fall down from tripping over a kickboard at the very edge of the pool, have you?”

I said, “No, I haven’t.”

“He makes me so angry! And he is so inconsiderate and very insensitive. You know, especially for someone who is actually USING it. I was using it! It makes me so mad. He always does this to me, too. It has happened more than once. Sometimes I get to the end of the pool and my kickboard is gone, and I see him and I know he took it.”

I said, “That’s so rude!”

(I was totally angry on his behalf.) I had now figured out that the man took his kickboard and thought it was funny, which is why he walked off doing that little dance. The nerve of him!

“Yes! Very rude. He makes me so mad, it’s very um…presumptuous of him. Yes? You know what I mean– presumptuous,” he said.

“Very presumptuous!” I said.

“Yes! He makes me so angry,” he said.

I asked him where he was from — because until then, I wasn’t sure. He told me Korea, and then I told him I knew some Korean. So he told me to tell him what I knew, and I did. Come to find out, he is a professor at the U of O. And he knows some of the profs I had at Cal State Fullerton. Small world, huh?
He told me his name was “Q.” I am sure that is not how you spell it, but that is how you pronounce it.

Anyhow, after he left, another woman came in the sauna and started hopping on one foot. “I have water in my ear!”

I said, “Oh, shake your head really hard and jump up and down, that should help.” So she did, but it didn’t come out. “I hate it when that happens, I said.” She said, “I know. Aren’t our ears amazing, though? I don’t know how kids these days do it when you’re in the car and they have their music blasting. I mean, it hurts my ears, and I don’t understand how they can stand it. I mean, it must hurt their ears, too, right? Or maybe not. Either way, they’re gonna damage their ears.” I agreed and said, “But maybe they’re trying to be cool. I went to a concert once but I used earplugs even though it wasn’t cool. Because I don’t want to damage my ears.” And she said, “I hear ya, sista.” LOL. I don’t know if a pun was intended on that one or not.

Then she started talking about her dad who has hearing aids and loves to watch the squirrels and birds, etc. outside. She wishes he could hear the birds. I told her it was sad he couldn’t hear very well.

Then I left and said, “Have a good night.” And she said to me, “You too, girl. Blessings.”

Those were my experiences at the gym today.

Surrender.

abbyblabby — Thu, 07 May 2009 02:04:00 +0000

Sometimes we don’t get until we give. There’s a verse in the Bible where Jesus says, “Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:39) If you “lose your life” for someone, you give it up. You don’t hold on to it. You surrender everything. Jesus wants all of us, every part of us…our whole entire life. You’d think that if you give your whole life away, you wouldn’t have anything left. But Jesus says that if we give it away for His sake, we’ll find it. That’s because life is found in Him. And we may think we’re missing out if we give up everything we hold so closely. We may think we have ‘found our life’ and we don’t need Him. But true life is found when we surrender our hopes and dreams and secrets, and life. We aren’t missing out. In fact, when we surrender everything to Him, He gives us more.

God Likes Colors, Too

abbyblabby — Sat, 02 May 2009 07:10:00 +0000

So earlier this week I was feeling down, maybe a bit discouraged…you know, we all have those days. I figured it was just because I was extremely exhausted, busy, and run down and worn out. So I tried to not let all the thoughts in my mind get to me too much. But the Lord knew they were getting to me anyway. So he sent a rainbow. I just love rainbows. I always have, and I probably always will. I think they’re beautiful. I wrote a poem about one when I was in Jr. High or High School. Anyway, I saw it as I was leaving work for the day. I immediately put my car in park before driving out of the parking lot so that I could take a picture of it. Then I jumped back in my car to drive off. I thanked God for the rainbow and then started thinking about it. About what God said about the rainbow, that it’s his promise to us that He’d never flood the earth again. And the more I thought about it, the more amazing it seemed to me. He didn’t have to use anything to remind us of His promise. He could have told us that His word was good enough, and He would have been right. But he picked this. He chose this, something with beautiful, vibrant colors, to help us remember what he said.

He chose colors to help us remember. He must have thought colors are important. And meaningful.

So I was thinking about that, and I was thinking, wow, that’s cool God. I mean, I know I have recently started painting and everything, and I really have enjoyed picking out different colors to paint with. I think it is so fun and I just love seeing all the different colors to choose from. But I thought, I don’t know, maybe it’s just a phase I’m going through or something and I’ll get over it soon. I keep thinking that, I don’t know why. But God spoke very clearly to me after I was driving away. It was very simple, but very powerful: “I like colors, too.”

In other words, “I made you who you are. I made you to appreciate this, to enjoy this. And I am the creator of colors, so you see, it’s not just you. I like them too. Look at how I chose to use them.”It really impacted me in a way that maybe a lot of people won’t understand, but the point is, that God knows when you’re down and doesn’t ignore what you’re going through. In fact, He’ll go out of His way to show you that He cares. The poem below was inspired by this experience. I wrote it the same night.

God Likes Colors, Too

I never really got it until You showed me today
That you speak to each of us in many different ways.
For some it’s through music, with beautiful sounds.
For others it’s nature that makes their heart pound.

Or those who feel closer to You when they dance–
they know it’s on purpose; it’s not just by chance.
And even for some it’s a hug here or there,
Which is all they need to know that You care.

Or when a baby’s born, and there’s no denying
The breath You’ve given them is the reason they’re crying.
You know what gets to us, what makes us tick,
So you give us those moments when things just click.

Today I saw the rainbow you painted in the sky,
It was bright, and radiant, and pleasing to the eye.
I watched it, and thought about the promise you made.
But even more came to mind as I watched it fade.

This is your artwork, displayed for all to see
But I felt like you put it there just for me.
You didn’t make me who I am out of the blue.
You spoke to my heart today–You like colors, too.

It’s all about Perspective… My review of “The Noticer” by Andy Andrews

abbyblabby — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 07:50:00 +0000

I seriously read this book in 3 days. You’ve got to read this…it’s an intriguing fictional story about a guy (who I believe represents Jesus) named Jones who encounters different people going through difficult times in their life. He shows up just in the nick of time, just when they are desperate, broken, and in need of some help, some wisdom, some perspective. Jones says that wisdom is the ability to see into the future the consequences of your choices in the present. How true that is!And sometimes, to gain wisdom, you need a little perspective. I don’t want to give anything away, but there are great stories woven throughout this book that will impact your heart. I cried at several points in the story because it was so moving. It didn’t move me as much as The Shack did, but this book called The Noticer was a fast read. You’ll want to know what happens next. There are several stories in the book that people I know would relate to, that I would easily give this book as a gift, or as a source of encouragement to a friend.

Hope you can hold on to.

abbyblabby — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 03:48:00 +0000

Some people say, “If you just don’t have any expectations about anything, you won’t be disappointed.” They say if you never hold on to hope, you won’t be let down. It’s a way to protect yourself from being emotionally crushed and hurt. So just don’t hope at all, they say. But what kind of a life is that? Hope and expectancy bring life, passion, and excitement. It’s true that you can place hope in people, things, or relationships. But people, things, and relationships will let you down. I’ve found there is an exception, though. True hope that will ultimately last is hope in Jesus Christ. You can always place your hope in Him and in a relationship with Him, because He will never let you down. It doesn’t mean we won’t ever go through tough times, because that’s a given. But especially during those times, this hope is what gets us through. It’s what we can cling to. And if we start to lose hope – which God knows that will happen – He gives us renewed hope.

Psalm 94:18-19 says, “I cied out, ‘I’m slipping!’ and your unfailing love, O Lord, supported me. When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer.”

Hope shows God that we trust Him and that we believe He won’t let us down or disappoint us. Hope is what keeps us going. And even hope that has been lost can be renewed…God gives us renewed hope.

This is what I painted on Friday night. I left my USB cord at work again so I had to take this with my cell phone. I wanted to post this before I got too busy during the week, but a sharper picture will be swapped out soon.

Good for the Soul…

abbyblabby — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 02:36:00 +0000

The audio CD’s on this Word of Promise Next Generation – New Testament are awesome. I recommend viewing the DVD that comes with it before listening to the audio CD’s. The different actors & actresses talk about their experience and after watching it, I was so excited to hear this dramatized version of the New Testament. They were all so passionate about this project, which inspired me to immediately pop it in my CD player in my car. I have the hardest time focusing myself enough to sit down and get in the Word, but I’m in my car all the time. I listened to the CD in the morning on my way to work, and on the way home from work. I also listened to it every now and then on the way to the gym. I got through the entire New Testament in a few months. Hearing it read by different people, out loud, was powerful. I also liked the introductions read before each book.

I’m a part of Nelson’s book review blogger program (http://brb.thomasnelson.com/) which is why I’m able to review this CD set. Check ‘em out…they’re good for the soul.

Lost at Alton Baker

abbyblabby — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 01:14:00 +0000

It doesn’t matter how old you are, one of the worst feelings in the world is feeling lost. You don’t know where to go, what to do, who to call. You’ve tried everything and still can’t find your way. Or maybe you’ve searched and found your answer, only to realize later that you’re still just as lost as ever. Well, on Monday I was as lost as ever. That’s not too unusual, if you know me. I can’t find my way anywhere. I can’t even read a map. They make no sense to me. If I had my mom’s genes, I’d be able to locate anything, anytime, anywhere. Unfortunately, I am the complete opposite.

Monday was a beautiful bright, sunshiney day in Eugene. I got off work and wanted to enjoy the last few hours of sunshine. So I decided I would go to Alton Baker park, about 5 minutes (driving) away from my apartment. After I had some dinner, I grabbed my iPod and filled my backpack with stuff for swimming. I was planning to take about an hour long walk at the park and then head to the gym to follow up with a swim.

I usually carry my cell phone with me everywhere, but I figured that since I wasn’t going to be out too long, and it was still broad daylight with lots of people out, that there was no need to carry anything by my iPod and car key. I wasn’t planning to be out more than an hour – an hour and a half at the most. So I started walking on the path right next to the river. It was so gorgeous. I was having a wonderful time listening to music while I walked, seeing lots of other people who were taking advantage of the nice weather. And I had done this same walk 3 other times with other people, so I figured I knew what I was doing. Well, I got to a footbridge that takes you across the river and into another park (I guess? I’m still not really sure where it takes you.) I was thinking if I started walking heading back the other direction, I would eventually end up where I started, like walking one big loop.

Well, after it got to be 8:00, it started getting dark. I started getting a little worried because I wanted to be back to my car before it started to get dark at all. So then I started jogging, thinking I’ll get to the end of the trail faster. It kept getting darker and darker, and the path just kept going.

I didn’t even know at that point how to get back to that footbridge I had crossed over. Well, I kept thinking that eventually I would come to the end. But then it got to be 9:30 and I had been out for 3 hours walking and jogging, with no end in sight. I then began to panic. I’m by myself, in the dark, in a park where now – there are not even lights. I could barely see the ground in front of me. They had maps throughout the park and as I stopped to study one, I still couldn’t figure out how to get back to where I needed to be. The little thing that said “YOU ARE HERE” really did me no good.

I tried to calm myself down, but it made matters worse when I heard a blood curdling scream coming from a woman yelling “HELP! HELP! HELP!” There were other people who happened to be out riding their bikes this late and yelled back “Is everyone okay?” A man shouted back, “WE’RE OKAY! JUST LAUGHING!” Well that worried me, since it was the woman who had been screaming. A guy on a bike said he was going to try and find them to make sure everyone really was okay. I asked him how to get back to Alton Baker, and he said he didn’t know. So I must have been pretty far from where I started.

After walking another 10-15 minutes I decided that the best thing to do was to get out of the dark and go where there were lights. I didn’t care if I ended up on the street at an intersection somewhere, I just wanted out of the dark. And that’s what happened. I ended up on the street – Franklin Blvd – facing the U of O. But I still didn’t know how to get back to Alton Baker from there, back to where my car was parked. I started walking one way, but it felt wrong (how would I know that? LOL) so I turned around and walked the other way. I finally came to the Ferry Street Bridge that takes me to Coburg road. I knew where I was, but I couldn’t figure out how to get over that bridge on foot. I didn’t see any foot bridge and would literally be hit by a car if I tried to walk over it – there’s no shoulder or anything. Well, I saw a sidewalk that went parallel to the bridge, so I thought maybe it went under and would take me to a foot bridge, but it didn’t. I ended up in downtown Eugene.

So now I really didn’t know what to do. It’s almost 10:00 pm and I’m by myself with no money, no cell phone, and no ID. I decide that I need to get somewhere and use a phone. So I look all around me and see the Eugene Hotel (quite a few blocks away) and the Eugene Hilton (a lot closer). I thought to myself that surely someone at the Hilton would let me use their phone. All I needed was to make a simple local phone call to my parents. So I walked in and started to explain my situation to the two 20-something receptionists. They looked at me like I was crazy so I got right to the point – “I just need to use the phone. Would I be able to make a quick–” and before I could finish one of them looked at me and said “You can use the pay phone behind the stairs.” Well, I had no money so that really didn’t help me. They clearly weren’t interested in helping me, either, but I thought I would try calling Collect. I tried twice, but it didn’t work. So now I’m stuck again. I walked another 4 blocks or more and ended up back where I started – but on the opposite side. Right below the Ferry Street bridge that I COULDN’T WALK OVER.

There was a bar right there on the left, but I was hesitant to go in. It was late, and I never go to bars as it’s an uncomfortable environment for me. But you know what, I was desperate. So I walked in there, and just like a scene in a movie, everyone stopped what they were doing and looked up and stared at me. I’m not kidding. Here I am in workout clothes and near tears, and everyone’s looking at me. But I was already in, so I went up to a girl working at the bar and started to explain my situation – “I’m lost….” my voice trailed off as I was almost crying! The girl just said “Do you need to use the phone, hun?” I didn’t even care that she called me ‘hun,’ I was just so glad to be able to use a phone! So I called my mom and she could tell I was panicked, I mean I’m never like that. She told me to calm down and that my dad would be right there, that I just needed to wait at the bar. So I hang up and then the 70 yr old man sitting next to me asked if he could give me a ride. I told him I had a ride, but thanks for the offer. He said “I wish I would have known before you got a ride, I’m heading that way and could drive you over. All these people here can vouch for me, I’m harmless.”

I thanked him again but politely declined. Then he said, “Well, can I at least buy you a beer?” I said, “No thanks, I don’t drink. But thanks for the offer.”

I should have asked for a Pepsi. Anyway, then the big bouncer guy came over and asked if I had my ID with me. Of course I didn’t, so he told me I needed to wait outside. So I did. But it wasn’t cold, it was still nice out. I waited for a painfully long 25 minutes, but my dad finally came. He gets lost just as bad as I do, so it took us a while in the car to find the park, but I made it just in the nick of time. I got my car right before the park closed. If I hadn’t made it, they would have closed the gates and my car would have been towed.

That was my adventure this week. Here’s what I learned: Never go to Alton Baker by myself period. Even if it’s broad daylight. Always take a cell phone with me everywhere I go, as well as a few bucks. The Eugene Hilton has lost my business. I’ll forever be grateful to that bar on 7th who let me use their phone. I’m glad I have parents in town. God took care of me, and…if you’re feeling lost, head to the light!

drama at the gym!

abbyblabby — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 02:06:00 +0000

okay…so we all get annoyed over stuff, right? i’m just gonna vent here, cuz i need to. i went straight to the gym right after work. it’s women’s day in the pool area until 7 pm, so i’m thinking that’s good – i’ll go, get in a good hour long lap swim, and then leave before the men come out and take over the pool. first of all, it took me quite a long time to find a parking spot (i usually don’t go so early — i usually go at 8,9, or 10 pm because it’s not busy then and i can get any machine i want). all that to say, i was already a little irritated.

i go in, and there’s a water aerobics class going on, which i knew about. it was on one half of the pool. the other side has 3 lap lanes for people to use. so i jump in at the same time this other lady gets in. which is fine, because there are 3 lanes. well one lady in the water aerobics class glared at me after i jumped in. i’m sorry if i splashed her, but we’re in the pool for crying out loud! that bugged me a little, but i got over it. i thought about it while swimming and later wondered if she glared at me because i took her kickboard. i didn’t think it was hers, though, cuz it was outside the pool, and the water aerobics class never uses kickboards. anyways.

so i’m swimming along, and another lady jumps in and says to me “do you have a preference of which lane you want?” nice of her to ask! so i said “i’ll take the middle lane if that’s cool with you.” she says “sure.” so, i’m totally fine, swimming along. there are now 3 of us in the pool.

then another woman is waiting at the other end of the pool. when i get to the end she says to me “i’m going to get in, so can we circle swim?” if you don’t know, a circle swim means you go in a circle and use the middle lane for passing so that more people than just 3 can swim. i don’t really like circle swim because it’s crowded and some people go slow and some fast and it messes up my workout. but, i want to be a nice and good person and do what Jesus would do, so i say “sure, that’s fine.” and so the lady says “okay, i’ll go tell the others.” so she goes down to tell 2 of them and is waiting for the third lady who is focused and intent on swimming back and forth in her lane without paying attention to any of us. we tried to tell her but she wouldn’t acknowledge any of us. so we decided to do a circle swim with only 2 lanes. how crazy is that! there are now 3 of us sharing 2 lanes while one lady gets her own lane because she won’t listen to us. so, there are a total of 4 of us in the pool at this point.

needless to say, it was crazy. but, i’m figuring, okay i’ll just buck up and get over it. so i just keep swimming. then, i hadn’t even done a full lap yet when–i’m not kidding – 2 other women jump in. there are now 6 of us in the pool. one woman was insistent that this was not fair that the one woman wouldn’t agree to a circle swim. so she stands right in her lane until the woman literally runs into her. so she now has no choice but to face her. the lady says “we’re all doing circle swim now, so you need to go in a circle with us.” the lady tells her “i have my own routine, i don’t want to do circle swim.” and the other lady says “well that’s what we’re doing, so you need to do it.” and she says “no, the rules say everyone must agree to a circle swim, and i don’t want to.”

i am not making this up! can you sense the built up frustration we all must be experiencing at this point??!?!

the lady then just continues to keep swimming in her “own lane.” the new rules do state that everyone must agree to a circle swim if that’s what’s going to happen.

so now 6 of us are all worried about getting head injuries because we seriously are almost running into each other. 5 people are sharing 2 lanes and it wasn’t pretty. so the one lady who was really ticked started swimming in the lady’s lane who wouldn’t share, and she seriously pushed her in the water and told her to get out of the pool! the lady didn’t care and after she was pushed just went around her and kept swimming. oh we were all so mad! i can’t even tell you how annoyed i was.

one lady said to me “have you ever encountered her before?” and i said “no.” and she said “she does this every time. she never shares.” they were all talking trash on her and you know what…i didn’t feel sorry for her. we’re all trying to work together here and she is not cooperating! no one else likes circle swim either, but it allows more people to swim who want to swim. we all pay to use this gym here! ugh!

we probably swam for 30 minutes with 6 of us crammed in there, in this ugly situation where people were almost running into each other. i was in there for an hour. anyway, i thought after 10-15 minutes surely people would get sick of it and get out. but they didn’t. i don’t blame them…we all want to get our workouts in and make plans for it. we have lives, things to do, we can’t just sit and wait around while people finish.

after people did get out (they all said they were going to complain to the front desk) i was still swimming and there were 3 of us. the lady who wouldn’t move, me, and the other lady who pushed her. the lady who pushed her told me “look at her, she’s so out of breath she can’t even swim the length of the pool.” she was struggling, you could tell…but there’s no way she was going to get out after causing such a fuss! she then proceeded to call her a “stubborn brat.” it was out of control!!

i’ve experienced a similar situation in the pool before, but it was a man who wouldn’t share and wouldn’t acknowledge any of us women trying to get his attention that we were going to circle swim. even when someone grabbed his arm, he kept swimming and ignored us.

people these days!!! i know i am not supposed to let the sun go down on my anger which is why i needed to get this all out before i go to bed so that i can calm down and forget about it. haha.

if i wasn’t concerned about being nice and being a good person and trying to do what Jesus would do, i would have probably went up to the lady and said “seriously, what’s the deal? can you just do a circle swim and get over it?” but that wouldn’t have been nice, so i didn’t. i digress now.